when I am random Alok Mishra

A window seldom opens when a gate is closed. I have been through this darker phase, at times, and felt the darkness so closely, dearly! Who cares for the light when darkness accommodates the calm of the soul which almost fears to lose the argument to the light which itself is ignorant of the brightness but just lights it up for the sake of doing so. Strange case but classic scenario… am I what I am supposed to be? But who has the authority to suppose what I should be? Darker is the light or brighter is the darkness; I am not me and that someone who has lured ‘me’ far from myself is no more seen. I shall continue ‘self’less.

Asking questions to myself is the only thing I keep doing in spite of this life which is becoming busier day by day. I don’t care to know who am I. Nor do I crave anymore for the existential goals – I am who I am and it was supposed to be, somehow. I rather ask myself what should I do to be better day by day and fortunately, I keep improving. What’s the use of dying to know ‘who you are’ in the abstract sense when you have a body to feed and many others to serve? Think; I thought; they already taught!

The reason I don’t want intrusions in my world is that I tend to make them my own and at times, it becomes painful! (highly conditional)

Do you also think it wasn’t necessary that we did? Oh! Life is like this my dear – a turn approaches when you think of pressing the accelerator!

I would rather live the life I have earned after how many of this and that (God knows) than wasting it thinking about the things (breathing as well) I don’t have with me. You do the same or not – I don’t care!

Past is never meant to be painful if you were tactful enough!

Poetry has taught me to be bolder and frank and lively. Only poetry can deal things playfully, even death!

I would rather read my poems to you than talking about our future 20 years from now.

If I am not dead already, come meet me in my library!